This is momentous. While my 13 month old daughter trying to wake up for her next nursing who is currently teething and also restless because of that one mosquito trying to make a mark on her forehead and me hoping to get another few more minutes before my mac dies with less than 20 mins of charge and parallely never stopping the hunt for that one mosquito and wanting to end this long sentence fast.... huh.....wait for it ( catching my breath) ... created my blog today. Finally, I managed to figure it out. So, this is indeed Momentous second for me, when I first clicked that publish button. It makes me proud, goofy and scratchy:) Ask my little one & that one mosquito :) Btw, taking about mosquitos, I am from India.
First, why clarity? I love clarity and I like to associate conversations, people, relationships with clarity. It makes me feel good. Purposeful rather. I love it when my husband drops that word in his daily convos. " That gives me clarity papa... "Hello, where is your clarity?". Love him. I do things not so perfectly but with diligence to the last word. I am 31, married to the great(est) man one could possibly find on this earth, struggled to find a place for myself, struggled a lot to find my career but fortunately landed a great job, earned a good reputation at work, travelled places, all of a sudden became that " successful person" amidst family, deputed to work in the US, made plans and seamlessly followed through and did well. Quite well I should say.
See, a greatest gift one could have for himself is to know exactly what he wants. I thought i got that under control until one fine day. For that day I waited, I prayed and I moaned. Literally. My A Type, borderline OCD personality ( Better word for Control Freak? ) wanted that day to come so fast, so that, I can check that one too in my agenda as 'DONE'. Boy, little that i know the overwhelming yet fulfilling emotion you go through both exactly at the same time which cannot be comprehended under any agenda. The day I lost the C.L.A.R.I.T.Y. The day I became a Amma. A Mom.
Most Precious.
13 months since the most beautiful day happened in my life when I met my daughter Aaradhana. 26th Mar 2012. 6 days past due. She was chilling I presume. Her personality very clear even then. They gave her to me crying and wailing and the moment i held her, she stopped. No sound. I vaguely remember she trying to open her eyes and really see me. Waiting for my voice she was so used to. Goose bumps. Indescribable. Touching. Tears. Laughs. Surreal. Wonder. Mushy. Thankful. Love. Love. Love. Goosebumps. Tears. Surreal. Pain. Love. Love. Light. Mushy. Grateful. Heavy. Hugs. Love. Love. Love. Tears. Imagine a bazillion of these emotions & effects happening on and on in a millisecond. A gush of emotions you never experienced in its raw nature comes to you pounding in an extraordinary way only a Mom, a parent can relate. Something deeply shifts in your heart, your soul and your entire self. And it will last for ever and travels with you and slowly becomes your second nature.
Well, that was precisely the moment, i lost clarity on what my life is going to be, other than being fabulous & shocking, both at the same time!!!
First, why clarity? I love clarity and I like to associate conversations, people, relationships with clarity. It makes me feel good. Purposeful rather. I love it when my husband drops that word in his daily convos. " That gives me clarity papa... "Hello, where is your clarity?". Love him. I do things not so perfectly but with diligence to the last word. I am 31, married to the great(est) man one could possibly find on this earth, struggled to find a place for myself, struggled a lot to find my career but fortunately landed a great job, earned a good reputation at work, travelled places, all of a sudden became that " successful person" amidst family, deputed to work in the US, made plans and seamlessly followed through and did well. Quite well I should say.
See, a greatest gift one could have for himself is to know exactly what he wants. I thought i got that under control until one fine day. For that day I waited, I prayed and I moaned. Literally. My A Type, borderline OCD personality ( Better word for Control Freak? ) wanted that day to come so fast, so that, I can check that one too in my agenda as 'DONE'. Boy, little that i know the overwhelming yet fulfilling emotion you go through both exactly at the same time which cannot be comprehended under any agenda. The day I lost the C.L.A.R.I.T.Y. The day I became a Amma. A Mom.
Most Precious.
13 months since the most beautiful day happened in my life when I met my daughter Aaradhana. 26th Mar 2012. 6 days past due. She was chilling I presume. Her personality very clear even then. They gave her to me crying and wailing and the moment i held her, she stopped. No sound. I vaguely remember she trying to open her eyes and really see me. Waiting for my voice she was so used to. Goose bumps. Indescribable. Touching. Tears. Laughs. Surreal. Wonder. Mushy. Thankful. Love. Love. Love. Goosebumps. Tears. Surreal. Pain. Love. Love. Light. Mushy. Grateful. Heavy. Hugs. Love. Love. Love. Tears. Imagine a bazillion of these emotions & effects happening on and on in a millisecond. A gush of emotions you never experienced in its raw nature comes to you pounding in an extraordinary way only a Mom, a parent can relate. Something deeply shifts in your heart, your soul and your entire self. And it will last for ever and travels with you and slowly becomes your second nature.
Well, that was precisely the moment, i lost clarity on what my life is going to be, other than being fabulous & shocking, both at the same time!!!
